Ever had a conversations where you completely lost it? I think we all have. Here’s how you can stay calm during a heated conversation with these easy and simple tricks you can do in any moment regardless of what the conversation is about.
The key to stay calm during any heated converstaion is to stay present in the moment. There are several portals you can use to stay present in the moment as you navigate through your daily life, through challenges, through a crisis, heated conversations and just in every moment of your day as you cook your meals, and go about your day.
The First Way to Stay Calm During a Heated Conversation
The first portal to stay calm and present is to feel the inner body, become aware of the energy field in the body. The fastest way to feel the inner body is to feel the sensations in your hands. Close your eyes and feel your hands you can ask yourself, how do I even know I have hands.
The Second Way to Stay Calm During a Heated Conversation
The second portal to stay calm and present is through your five senses–sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell. Become aware of your environment. Can you hear the external noises? Can you smell anything? Can you feel the garments touching your body?
The Third Way to Stay Calm During a Heated Conversation
The third portal to stay calm and present is to become aware of your breath. Just notice the in and outflow of your breath. The simple act of becoming aware of your breath brings you immediately into the present moment because your breathing is always happening in this moment, not yesterday nor tomorrow.
The Fourth Way to Stay Calm During a Heated Conversation
The fourth portal to stay calm and present is through body awareness. Most of us understand this, and when challenges arise or we are in a heated conversation we take a deep breath in and then another, but then after one, two three breaths,we forget. We lose it anyway and completely identify with the crisis or challenge.
So what you can do is connect with your body in some way. If you find yourself in the middle of an external challenge, perhaps a heated conversation, and you don’t want to lose yourself, you want to connect with your body.
Let’s say, for example, you are having a discussion, and the conversation gets out of hand, and you can feel yourself starting to lose it.
Body Awareness tip #1
What you can do is to roll your thumbs together. But not just roll them and think about what a jerk this person is; I can’t believe this jackass, oh no, I don’t believe a word he is saying. That is so not true.
Whatever the argument is, just listen to the other person, it doesn’t mean you can’t say anything, but as you listen, instead of jumping in and interrupting the other person, hear them out.
And suppose you start to loose it as you are listening because perhaps they are accusing you of something, so what you want to do is roll your thumbs together and feel the sensation in your thumbs. You can try it now. Roll your thumbs together and feel the sensations in your thumbs as you are reading this article. You can do the same when you are listening to someone speaking.
And if they start yelling at you, hine into that sensation, feel the feeling. It helps you connect with the body, which allows you to connect to stillness, the awareness you are.
Body Awareness tip #2
Another one is to pinch your index finger and thumb together. When you do this, you will feel some sensations.
So when you feel yourself getting all heated up, just have your hands down by your side and pulse the tips of your fingers together.
You can feel as you are pulsing them together; the activation of energy, you can feel the energy flow in your hands and in your arms, and you could be listening or talking at the same time, and it will help you to stay present in the here and now.
When you are present in the moment you are less likely to lose yourself, and it’s easier to remain calm regardless of what is going on around you.
So if you start feeling emotions arise, press your fingers, pulsate, and feel the energy in your hands.
Body Awareness tip #3
The third body awareness tip and this is a more drastic body trick to help you stay aware if you are in a heated discussion with somebody after you’ve gone through all of the above and you are like, oh my goodness, how else can I stay in my body?
You can stand on one leg; it doesn’t mean you have to lift your leg way high, just lift it slightly off the floor, you can even wrap your ankle around your other ankle.
To stand on one leg means you have to balance, and to balance, you’ve got to be able to stay in your body.
When you practice this on your own, you will notice that when you stand on one leg and you are balanced, there is not much movement happening in your mind.
But when you start thinking, you will notice movement, and you will most likely lose your balance.
So if you are going through a big heated discussion with somebody standing on one leg is a big one to help you stay rooted in the body.
When you are rooted in the body, the mind isn’t working actively; your mind slows down, you can feel your breath, feel your inner body most of all, and feel the stillness within.
Conclusion
By accepting what is going on and staying in the present moment through the breath, sense perceptions, feeling the inner body, or connecting to your physical body, you can transmute emotions and thoughts.
Three ways to connect with your body:
- Roll your thumbs
- Pulsate your index finger and your thumb
- Stand on one leg
Helpful Resources
- How to be at peace amidst challenging situations
- Best quick fix for quieting the monkey mind
- 3 Kickass ways to increase team spirit at work and in your daily life
- 2 Kickass ways to master your mind
If this message inspired you please leave a comment below. If you have other tricks to stay present in the moment please share with us, we would love to hear from you.